Addicted!!

I was convinced I was made of sterner stuff. But that blew up in my face when a friend introduced me to something that not only gives me a high, but has me going back for more. Damn, I thought I was above all these petty things after I left college. Even in those days, of my long forgotten youth, I was strong enough to say no. Or maybe, I just wasn't curious enough.

I've been around the world and tried a few things here and there, which, frankly, couldn't hold my juvenile attention for too long. Now, as I grow older and, perhaps, more focused, I find myself drawn to things I would never have considered before. Although I must admit, the prospect of having an influence that grabs your attention and desire so compellingly, has always facinated me. Like I said, I thought I was above it all.

Oh my God, Ma!! It's definitely not what you think....it's worse! This overwhelming need to get a fix every single day is starting to get to me. I tried once to stop, stayed away for a whole 35 hour, 4 minutes and 23 seconds. Thought it was going to a piece of cake. Man! was I wrong!! I couldn't sleep that night. Every time I closed my eyes, it felt like the anticipated fear of when you can see a huge lead weight dangling over your head, and you don't know if it's going to fall. The day was even worse. Every waking moment was spent in dreaming about how I felt when I had had a hit. It was excruciating!

I've finally come to the realization that I'm better composed and prepared to face this big bad world only after I've had a hit. Yes, I'm rendered inaccessible for a good half hour once I'm in my zone. But this is me. I feel better every time I attain a new level. I don't think I'm going to give this up too soon, I like it too much. I just wanted to let the world know, that things like this can happen to anyone. I'm not special or above it all and this has just been a wake up call, to see myself as human (not talking in extra-terrestrial terms). I'd tell you not to get involved or try it but I'd be doing a disservice to society in general. But if you should try it, don't ever say I didn't warn you!

Who knows, maybe you're stronger than I am. But if not, come be my neighbor on Farmville.