Sunday, February 20, 2011

Toilets in reptile house!

I,I...see stupid people! (voice over: Hailey Joel Osmond from The Sixth Sense)

We went to the zoo yesterday. Two hours of undulating road, through the heart of the Indian capital, on foot, to look at caged animals is a feat, but to do it with three hyper monkeys, a senile sloth, and a grumpy gorilla is an undertaking of the Gods. I am not particularly fond of zoos. The concept of caging animals for the viewing pleasure of humans seems just as misguided as placing toilets in the reptile house. But alas, the things we put up with for our children!

The day was spent looking at different species of animals. The monkeys (the caged ones), seem to enjoy watching my cackling brood as they meted out their version of monkey behavior. The crocodiles and alligators looked like they had been frozen (or maybe stuffed) and my only option for finding out if they were real, was to throw them something to eat...but I am against cruelty to animals. The mid-morning monotonous air was regularly interrupted with the roar of the only lion of the zoo. A magnificent creature prowling a 4 x 6 cage, really pissed at something. The two elephants of the facility offered only their rear ends for view, making it difficult to differentiate (for my kids) who was Indian and who was African. To me, one ass is the same as another! The bears, the giraffes, the tigers, the dogs, looked as lazy as I felt. The hours seem to crawl by at a devastatingly slow pace.

Now back to the beginning. People, especially stupid ones, irk me to no end. The zoo is supposed to be a sanctuary for animals. But how on earth or other wise are these animals safe in cages, when dimwitted idiots throw things in?
 Imagine for a minute, a beautiful Jaguar basking in the sun. It's glossy coat all a shimmer, it's breathing barely audible, it's eyes closed in sweet slumber. Enter left, 4 physically grown men, with the combined mental ability of a brick, brandishing a plastic bottle. They then proceed to scrape the bottle on the Jaguar cage, waking him up. The big feline, now excited, tries to paw at the bottle, so the morons throw it in. The cat pounces on the newly acquired chew toy and gives a performance for the onlooking cheering crowd. And I seem to be the only outraged person around. What a ditz!!

 Is it just me who thinks this is totally wrong? I ain't a saint but I definitely am not cruel, and this is one for human cruelty books (as if caging animals wasn't bad enough). At times like these I just want to slap some civic sense into people, but then one must always remember; common sense isn't as common as we think! It's places like the zoo that really bring out the pinnacle of stupidity in people.

I leave you with just a couple of examples.

Thursday, February 17, 2011

Empty Canvas

Call me crazy. Hey, I heard that! I seem to have found another way of pissing people off. It's easy when you understand how.

I have harbored a, not so secret, desire, for what feels like years. Some could interpret it as a juvenile need to lash out. But honestly, at my age, it's probably more a middle-aged need to lash out. To think a nice, docile, down to earth kinda lady like myself (Stop Laughing!!) could even contemplate something of this magnitude will shock the pants off many people. But alas, that is the way of being adamant.

I have given the matter much thought. Thought of the immediate and long term repercussions of my intended actions. What would my children think of me? Would I be able to explain my long researched, ambitious undertaking to those who matter? Would I be able to look my self in the mirror and be proud? Well, my kids have to live with the realization that their mom is now old enough to make decisions for herself. Since the undertaking is pretty well researched, convincing those who matter should be a cake walk. However, if they refuse to see it my way... suck it up and live with it! And as for me looking at myself in the mirror, that shouldn't be a problem, since I plan to put it behind me immediately.

Yes, I'm ready. I think I've reached a point in my life where I can take such a daring step. From what I've read, many women have taken the leap forth, although some have regretted it. But what is life if you don't try things at least once! It's now or never, or maybe in a few months, but my mind is set. I no longer have qualms about doing what I choose to do, perhaps because the ultimate consequences have to be borne by me and no one else. The scardy cat in me has now transformed into a fighting tiger. So, mom and dad, always remember, I am still the same little girl with the gurgling laugh, the same beautiful child who gave you grief. This decision will not change me.

Like they say, what doesn't kill you, makes you stronger! And, a tattoo will not kill me...or will it?