Karwa Chauth

Yesterday was my first real Karwa Chauth, since I'm now in Delhi. You know the festival, where women, ususally married, starve themselves for their husband's long life, albeit for a day. Women in the apartment complex, where we live, came together to offer prayers and conduct the traditional rituals related to this occasion. Even at work, my female, married colleagues spent a good deal of time gawking at each other's mehndi'd hands, sarees and god knows what else.

I don't know if it's just me, actually it's also my eldest daughter, who just can't get the whole thing. She put it the best way: 'why would anyone want to starve for the whole day for someone else?' I tried my level best to explain to the child that it has to do with commitment and love, (supposedly), but she just counter questioned: if you love some one, why would you starve yourself? Wouldn't that hurt them too? Couldn't argue with that! The next question was a little more difficult to answer, in front of her father: why is it just women who do the starving? As diplomatically as possible, I told her that it was tradition. Women were stronger and better at keeping the family bonds intact. I also explained that it wasn't just women who did the fasting, men did it too, now a days, which seemed to placate her some. Didn't want to go into the topic of gays also fasting for their significant others on Karwa Chauth. That's just a whole another can of worms I didn't want to deal with then.

I would have let it drop at that, except my child then proceeded to ask if I was doing this 'fasting' thing. Honestly, the thought of fasting itself scares me to a near unconscious state, and to do it for something as monumental as showing my devotion to my husband, definitly doesn't call for fasting. So, I politely said no, the husband sitting in front of me, and finished with "I don't need to starve myself to show your father I love him". Now that really seemed to please her, but all I got from the spouse was a dramatic roll of the eyes. So much for heart felt emotion.

So, Karwa Chauth was like any other day for me. I worked, shopped, played with the kids, made dinner, worked out, stayed up with my husband, and all without the added stress of being food and water deprived. That would have made me unlovable.